Thursday is supposed to a good day

Thursday is supposed to a good day

I received this e-mail from Sarah and it totally describes today. To start, I was unable to get out of bed this morning. Due to the after effects of the Johannesburg drive – my weak kidney has its revenge a few days later. Add to that – I am tired and not handling the empty nest syndrome as well as I thought I would. I have this empty hole in my heart and now Sarah must get on board and give me grand children! Her new man was quite taken aback when Sarah told him that before she met him I told her to go to the sperm bank, buy some baby making stuff, and make me a grandmother. Okay so I need therapy – I think we have all agreed on this. I ask myself what God was thinking when he decided I needed to be a parent and then he blessed my children with all the ADCOCK'S (my dad's genes) traits with our magnet for the ridiculous.

I am sure I will have to live two life times to actually document all my memories of the situations I experienced as a kid and now a "kid" pretending to be an adult. Wrinkles and grey hair do not mean ‘wise soul’ -it just means kid with wrinkles and grey hair in training. Sarah sent me her resignation letter for being an adult. I of course giggled because we all have these wild and wonderful dreams about being in charge of our own destiny. Bills are a real killer and having to buy our own toiletries and smokes and worry about electricity – even going through our second childhood does not negate our responsibilities. Pity as I am looking forward to being a child in mind again and possibly get my vengeance on my kids by running down the streets naked and keeping them up late at night worrying about where I am? Right now, Mutt and Jeff have decided to go back to their paradise and I think Fiona had something to do with that. This has added to my empty nest syndrome and missing ducks; maybe my second childhood is just around the corner.

Fiona has had enough. She had been quite patient with their visiting but when it looked like they had decided to take residence in her swimming pool which interfered with her daily swimming routine – she let out one big woof and charged them. Quite an intimidating sight if you do not realize she is quite gentle. This white bundle of puffed up fur and white wolf like teeth. This was good enough to evict Jeff and Mutt. I do miss their visits but Fiona does have rite of passage here. She barley coped with the kittens and I am sure she thought that Jeff and Mutt would produce little duckling s and this was too much for her.

After dragging my weary body out of bed, I stumbled into the office and was met with chaos. One of our drivers had not pitched for work and it was all hands on deck. Forget about preparing this work of art for the public and hiding all the magical bumps I have developed through the years. I was abandoned to take over the operations of the office and drivers and collection and if I had not known, better I would swear my hair decided it was on strike. More so than normal. No amount of wetting it and pasting it down on my forehead helped this morning. I think my hair is applying for a nest for the mouse looking for a new apartment. I just have to accept that I am not going old gracefully.

I was busy writing a letter to my cousin about age and how our bodies have changed with time. This coincided with a conversation I was having with our Cape Town Representative. We are handling a big distribution and they have not given us enough time for the delivery by Friday

Our fear was that this was not going to be done on time as the client has not even given us 15 tons for delivery yet and it has to be delivered tomorrow. Ummmmmmm let me think about that. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. I told this to the rep in CPT and asked her if they think we have jet-fueled helicopters. So she said no… we will have to use out time machine. So I said screw that – I would go back and retrieve my 19-year-old body would use it today and would not change anything that happened in the past because I would not have my wonderful family – but I would most definitely keep the body! She thought this was very funny as I described my disappointment in this 46-year-old body that just hangs like an old rag! After all, I abused it and if I had the 19-year-old body, I would really flaunt it now. I would sit on my letterbox outside naked in pride! And oh wow be tide anyone who tried to flash their perky boobs, I would show them perky. But time machines have not been invented and even if they had, I would not be able to afford them. So it’s walking the dogs when there weather is better, tying my shoes as this is now exercise for me and throwing my toys out the cot (tantrum) as this is also now considered exercise. I pacify myself with the comment “Get into shape….what the hell do you think round is…..it’s also a shape - is it not -so you and your shape comments can go to the gym to find that perfect shape... Not me I will waddle around and be happy with who I am. Hahahaha

Yeah that is how I feel, health first and beauty last. Being a woman is easy as men get away with their flabby bodies and flabby other parts, ours are on display and when the boobs are squashed into the bra and one nipple is pointing upwards and the other one down wards, I just say, its showing North and South.

I need to fly the flag of acceptance - 'this is me' and if you do not like it – do not come into my personal space. I am me -and all in all I am a wonderful loving person and have never hurt anyone or killed anyone and if you carry on bugging me, I will break my record and kill you!

Speaking of flying Flags, I think the trophy should go to Cait today for flying her freak flag. I really wonder where she gets it from… most certainly not her wonderful sane mother. I received a Skype from her today as she had decided that she needed to tell me how she was infected with the dreaded "foot in mouth syndrome" while she was sitting in her boss Ruby’s office discussing the days plans. She was playing with the clock on Brad’s desk (her Imports Manager), she notices that the clock is not working, and quite innocently asks Ruby

“Ruby why is brads C--K not on?”

Ruby looks at her with this enormous grin and says, “What is not on Cait?

Cait says, “OMG I mean clock, clock, clock!”

Ruby could not contain himself and burst out laughing as Cait was by this stage bright red and giggling like a schoolgirl who has been caught in a compromising position. She begged Ruby not to tell Brad and typical of brothers who work together he could not wait to ask Brad how Cait knows anything about his personal appendages. Cait seems to have a way of really making the situations worse for herself when it comes to Brad who by the way is an almost splitting image of Brad the actor but a little shorter. So he is considered a real Hottie!

When Brad bought his new Car an Audi, Cait watched him drive in through the work gates and exclaimed “Wow that is sexy and walked back to her desk.

She heard Gavin the owner of the company, chortling. Gavin felt quite pleased, as he is Ruby and Brad’s father so this obviously tickled his self-pride just a little to have such Hot sons. 'Like father like son ' is the comment he makes when he is complemented on his sons' good looks. Cait turned and looked at him and he was sitting there all puffed up with this big smile of achievement and satisfaction on his face.

Cait asked him what he is so pleased about and he grinned even wider and had a cheeky twinkle in his eyes. It took Cait about three seconds to re-wind what she had said in her head and it hit her like a lightning bolt!

She quickly shouted “No Not Brad – the CAR!”

Gavin just nodded and gave her that ‘I believe you but thousands wouldn’t’ look. Ruby of course heard all of this and interjected:

“You think brad is seeexxxxyyy”

To Cait’s shock and total embarrassment (her words to me) – “true as cookies when brad comes in I can hear ruby telling him and Brad then shouts out thanks Cait!”

She then gleefully confesses that I am not the only one who gets into these situations and she is a brilliant source of material for my blog…Thank you Cait, keep up the good work. I appreciate your efforts to help me with my blog.

This conversation happened before the work situation became so busy that I was unable to focus as I was answering phones and placing collections and I completely forgot that Bern’s mom was in the office/lounge with m. I threw down the phone, swore using the “F” word, and said “I just can’t do this – this is just too much and I am one person and ……….. Really threw a ‘hissy’ fit. See I told you I get exercise from throwing my toys out of the cot. Today was a really good exercise day.

I was busy sorting through the paper work when I heard this soft timid voice in the background. “Shell can I bring you two Anacin (headache pills) and a cup of coffee?” Shame man, mom is not used to the freight industry where everything is a rush and a quick decision has to be made, things do go wrong, and I think my outburst scared her. To make up for my outburst I took her with me to deliver a shipment in Howick and Hilton, we had lunch, and she had the chance to see more of our beautiful scenery here in Kwa Zulu Natal.

On the drive, I explained to her that what she witnessed was not me losing it, but just my coping mechanism I have developed in this industry. I pointed out that Bern would have handled it slightly differently. I had a fit, phoned Bern and told her that her drivers had switched waybills and the documents were delivered to the wrong destinations. I now had the delightful duty of advising the client. Which I duly did and explained how it happened and we managed to come up with a solution. Now Bern would have phoned the driver – offered to kill him and then phoned the client and without any tact – told her that she needs to complete the waybill details and put the numbers on the envelopes to prevent this type of mishap and then realize she was phoning to apologize and throw an apology in.

This distribution is not going well and its one of those days when you feel it is never going to end. Tomorrow starts with Bern off to the airport to go and collect the shipments and then she has the backbreaking task of sorting through the freight. I do not envy her but I do pity me – I have to handle the phones and collections and all the stuff that goes with running a freight company...allllll onnnnn my own again!  When I am rushed to a home for the mentally handicapped, please get me a computer so I can update my blog. Speaking of mentally handicap homes; on the way to collect a parcel in Hilton, we passed a sign for a mentally handicapped home. I gently reached over to mom in the car and patted her hand and said, “Don’t worry mom, the reason for this trip was not to drop you off here!”

She looked at me with rosy cheeks and said, “I will clip you!’ What an adorable person. If we had more people like Bern’s mom in this world there would be no crime or hate. Her remedy, train the men when they are babies to treat woman with respect - I totally agree and this would over flow onto how they treated other people too. Quite a wise person June Brooks! Maybe she will come visit me at this home for the mentally handicapped when Bern takes me there after one of my many tantrums (Bern refuses to accept this is my only form of exercise!) and pat my hand with her sweet smile. I am sure she will remind me of my comment about dropping her in the home.

Source: http://lifeandlaughterwithsunflowergirl.blogspot.com/2010/08/thursday-supposed-to-good-day-i.html

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